U is for Unicorn

U

U took me by surprise! U really shouldn’t sneak up on people, especially not when they are (a) old and weak of mind (b) highly trained ninja combat warriors or (c) are thinking they should really get up for that bathroom break. U can ponder which applies to yours truly.

Anyhow, without further ad-U. Here’s U. I’m in danger of lapsing into the drunken prose of a Glaswegian dockworker:

“What’re U loookin’ at?”

“Dee I ken U?”

“Hey, U. Gi us a pint a Heavy”

And talking about drunken Scotsmen, I’m reminded of a Canadian band called the Irish Rovers (no, I can’t see the connection either, but it’s my blog and I can say what I like). The Irish Rovers most significant hit by far (read ‘only’) was the Unicorn Song. So what better way to celebrate U than with the story of the playful Unicorn.

This song has the distinction of being my first ever iTunes purchase (this was the better part of 10 years ago, for my then 7 year old daughter). I’ve no doubt the Irish Rovers are firm believers in the magical Unicorn. They would have been set for life off the proceeds of this little ditty – it was released in 1968 and has sold over 8 million copies (you’re welcome boys).

 

The Unicorn Song

A long time ago, when the Earth was green Unicorn
There was more kinds of animals than you’ve ever seen
They’d run around free while the Earth was being born
And the loveliest of all was the unicorn

There was green alligators and long-necked geese
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you’re born
The loveliest of all was the unicorn

The Lord seen some sinning and it gave Him pain
And He says, “Stand back, I’m going to make it rain”
He says, “Hey Noah, I’ll tell you what to do
Build me a floating zoo,
and take some of those…

Green alligators and long-necked geese
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you’re born
Don’t you forget my unicorns

Old Noah was there to answer the call
He finished up making the ark just as the rain started to fall
He marched the animals two by two
And he called out as they came through
Hey Lord,

I’ve got green alligators and long-necked geese
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
Some cats and rats and elephants, but Lord, I’m so forlorn
I just can’t find no unicorns”

And Noah looked out through the driving rain
Them unicorns were hiding, playing silly games
Kicking and splashing while the rain was falling
Oh, them silly unicorns

There was green alligators and long-necked geese
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
Noah cried, “Close the door because the rain is falling
And we just can’t wait for no unicorns”

The ark started moving, it drifted with the tide
The unicorns looked up from the rocks and they cried
And the waters came down and sort of floated them away
That’s why you never see unicorns to this very day

You’ll see green alligators and long-necked geese
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you’re born
You’re never gonna see no unicorns

[New Lyrics added to avoid the sad ending]

Now you might think this is the ending to the song,
But I’ll have to tell you friends that in fact you’re wrong
You see, Unicorns are magical, so when the rain started pouring,
They grew themselves some wings and they took to soaring.

You’ll see green alligators and long-necked geese
Some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
But if you’re looking for the unicorns, don’t be forlorn,
The second star to the right and straight on until morning.

[ From The Unicorn Song Lyrics on http://www.lyricsmania.com/ ]

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