P is for Praying Mantis

The Celibate MantisP

I’m a celibate Praying Mantis,

A queer choice to make, some say.

I like the girls, most surely,

I’m just not ready to go all the way.

 

My choice is through necessity,

To keep my body whole.

If I sleep with just one woman,

She will steal away my soul.

 

I don’t mean metaphoric,

I mean quite literally.

If we do the down and dirty,

She’ll invite me in for tea.

 

She won’t have any crumpets

No toast, or country ham.

She has her mind on other food,

A slice of Mantis man.

 

You may think I’m over-stating,

Nice girls would not do that.

But my buds all went with women,

And not one has yet come back.

 

For one sweet night of passion,

It’s a mighty price to pay.

Four minutes (!) of lovey-dovey,

And then, auf wiedersehn!

 

And so I sit in contemplation,

Praying, “Please, let her be restrained”.

I just want to love her sweetly,

And again, and again, and again.

 

So when you see me praying

I’m not seeking to atone

I just want SEX, goddamit

Then leave me well alone!

 

Here’s your P. Take it and be gone, you accursed AtoZ Challenge!

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “P is for Praying Mantis

Add yours

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: