A: Four: Two in the front, two in the back.
Q: How many giraffes will fit into a Mini?
A: None. It’s full of elephants.
Q: How do you get two whales in a Mini?
A: Along the M4 and across the Severn Bridge (Brit joke alert)
Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your refrigerator?
A: You can hear giggling when the light goes out.
Q: How do you know there are three elephants in your refrigerator?
A: You can’t close the door.
Q: How do you know there are four elephants in your refrigerator?
A: There’s an empty Mini parked outside.
I’ve got two elephant stories for you – one inspirational, the other less so.
My Good Lady and I took our honeymoon on safari in Kenya and Tanzania. She often encouraged me to take early morning walks in the grounds of the lodges. I wonder whether she was regretting her haste to the altar, and was trying to get me eaten by a lion returning from a late night at the watering hole?
One of our stops was at Ngorongoro Crater, a mystical preserve in the Tanzanian highlands. This ancient caldera is home to countless animals. The lodge sits at 8000ft above sea level, on the crater rim. In the early morning there is mist rolling over the crater rim to the basin, 6000ft below. This day, we were driving along the rutted dirt road to reach the crater floor. We had just left the lodge compound when our guide hit the brakes. Then, right across our path, a troop of elephants came out of the bush. We watched as the troop majestically and slowly made their way across the road. We counted 6 or 7 adults and a couple of youngsters. The troop continued their journey back into the bush, and the mists swallowed them. They moved with such majesty, and were almost silent in their trek.
That trip included many memorable highlights, but the sight of these magnificient creatures stays with me to this day. As does a less magnificent encounter with these noble giants. This time, the scene was a French zoo. We were at the elephant enclosure, admiring the pair of beasts, when one of them moved over behind the other. He proceeded to push his trunk up the butt of his friend (I assume they were friends, by the behaviour). He then pulled out his trunk, complete with a warm, steaming ball of dung. He swung his trunk around and popped this dainty morsel into his mouth.
We left – and skipped lunch.
Posted in response to the 2014 AtoZ blogging challenge. 5 down, 21 to go.